Meditation teaching and mentoring
I work virtually with a small number of meditators directly for 1:1 teaching and mentoring. Meetings are typically 45 minutes. I am happy to work with beginners or with more experienced meditators.
If you are new to working with me in this capacity, my suggestion for getting started is that we meet once a week for the first month. This will help to establish a relationship and will allow me to better understand your practice.
I follow the ancient tradition of dāna (the Pali word for generosity), which means that I don't attach fees to any of my dharma work. Instead, I offer my time and teachings as a gift. This work is truly an expression of gratitude for the dharma, and for those who shared it freely with me. If you feel moved to support me in this work, I gratefully accept donations via Venmo: @Doug-Kremm-1.
If you are interested in working together, you can fill out this short form. I read each response carefully and will reach out personally to find a time to connect. Please note that, because my schedule is limited and I don’t do this for pay, I can’t always meet with everyone right away.
More on dāna
The Buddha famously said that one should not make a business of the dharma (Ud 2.6). The dharma is priceless, and it can get distorted when it gets brought into the marketplace. It is very, very hard to keep one’s practice pure when it is bound up with the logic of buying and selling.
There is also an inspirational quality that feels important to me here. When I have met others who live this practice and share the dharma freely without charging a price, that has stirred a deep faith in me, and I’ve found myself moved by their example. Here is something so wonderful, so profound, so transformative that these people are willing to shape their lives in such a way that they can devote time and energy just to sharing it — and without asking anything in return. How incredible! There’s no gimmicky marketing, no one pressuring you or trying to sell you the latest thing. How refreshing!
And yet, one has to make a living. What to do?
Since ancient times, many followers of the Buddhist path have striven to offer their dharma work without demanding a price. If one feels inclined to give– wonderful! If not– well, that’s the way it is. Trust in the practice and let it bring what it brings. I can adjust my own life accordingly. If people are called to support me in this work and have the means to do so, I will offer what I can. If it’s not working, that’s also a sign, and I’ll have to adjust to that.
This is a fundamentally different model from the mode of economic exchange we are used to in the West. In fact, the very ideas of transaction and exchange are out of place here. Dāna (pronounced “DAH-nuh”) is not about buying or selling, nor is it really about “donating.” It is about giving freely from a deep sense of fullness and gratitude. When one feels moved to give in this way, one does so not out of a sense of debt or obligation, but as a natural expression of the generous heart. So: I give support and guidance in whatever way I can, out of a deep desire to help and to share this path that has been so transformative in my own life. If you are touched by that, then you might feel moved to give something in return. That’s how the practice works.
I find it deeply moving to reflect on the staying power of this practice. It has survived for thousands of years, and this tells us something beautiful about the nature of generosity and the nature of the dharma. I offer my services with a deep sense of trust and faith in this path.
Some people would like to give but feel unsure how much to give, and this creates a sense of discomfort. That is actually part of the practice of dāna — learning to navigate that discomfort, and to give in a way that feels right for you, rather than trying to give in accordance with some abstract idea of how you should give. As you work to navigate this unfamiliar practice, here are a couple approaches you could try:
What if you sat down for a few minutes and said: “I am going to give an amount that acknowledges the worth of your work while also honoring my own well-being.” What comes up?
You might try thinking about some experience or activity you value and that you typically pay for. How much do you pay for that thing? Does that feel like a fair or appropriate price to you? Then, you can ask how the value of a 45-minute meditation mentoring session compares. This is one way to try to figure out what feels like the “right” amount to give.
You might try giving very little, say a dollar, or 25 cents. Really, I won’t judge you for this. Then you can set aside some time and reflect. How did that feel? Did it feel good? If not, you could try increasing next time, and go on like that until you find yourself thinking, “Okay, that feels about right.”
One final note: please, please do not let your experience of dāna be spoiled by your financial circumstances or by vague worries about how I will perceive you. I am not making judgments about how much you value our sessions based on how much dāna you give. I do not know the causes behind any particular act of giving, and I don’t attempt to know. I receive all gifts -- even gifts of 25 cents, which I believe is the minimum on Venmo -- with genuine gratitude. In fact, I would rather receive a gift of $0.25 that was a genuine, heartfelt expression of gratitude than to receive a fistful of cash from someone who hadn't put their heart into it. If money is tight, a thoughtful email is great. This is a personal journey. Let it be about the beauty of gratitude and the giving that flows from that. Don’t let it be about what others (including me) think.
